Writing is… a warm puppy?

by Julie Frayn on May 17, 2012 in  Writing

A warm puppy I miss a lot

There are days I wonder why I write. Why I torture myself sitting in front of this screen, pouring my heart and soul onto a virtual page. Why, on those days where the rest of my life takes priority, the guilt of not writing is so consuming.

My friend Sean Farley wrote on his Boulder Uphill blog:

“. . . writing is more than just stories and novels. It’s a passion, a need to be artistic. It’s a wound that needs healing. It’s laughter and sadness. It’s anything we want it to be, as long as we believe in it.

There is truth in that quote. Accuracy. Heart. The deepest bit that struck me was the healing wound thing. I stopped short when I read it and thought yeah, yeah. That’s it. Actually nodded my head at the monitor like a loon. It has made me wonder – what is writing to me?

Writing is red. It is the stuff of life, the crimson that flows through my veins. It is that spark of color in a neutral room. It is scarlet patent leather stilettos punctuating a black suit.

Writing is my third child. A child that embodies all the characters I love. All the broken souls (the ones I broke on purpose for the sake of story) who I can’t hug in person, whose hair I can’t stroke and tell them it’s going to be all right. Because for some of them it never will be.

Writing is release. To quote my Chili Pepper’s My Friends, release is peace. Finding the right combination of words, the perfect sentence, prompting me to moan yes, yes, yes at my monitor, hits the writing g-spot. Some days I have multiple literary orgasms. I am temporarily sated but hunger for more.

Writing is solitude. It is me time. Better than any spa day. Better than shopping. No, really. It is that time I can be crazy in private, sing at the top of my lungs, pace the floor and swear at my computer, then pet the screen in apology because, really, is it the computer’s fault when I can’t get it right? When I do that stuff in public, people look at me funny.

Writing is connection. When I write, I touch others. Not in a creepy, get your hand off my thigh before I scream, kind of way. Virtual touching. Emotional touching. Deeper level touching.

Writing is hope. It is everything I am not. Everything I am afraid to be. Everything I can be. Everything I will be.

Writing is breath. Without it, I fear I may die.

 

{ 18 comments… read them below or add one }

mj monaghan May 17, 2012 at 4:49 pm

Very nicely summed up. Love that line you quoted:
It’s a wound that needs healing.

That struck me immediately. Great imagery.

And the connection with writing is what sucks me in. That’s why blogging is so rewarding – the interaction between writer and reader and back the other way.

Reply

Julie May 17, 2012 at 5:03 pm

That interaction is definitely the great part of blogging. Yes. The novel/book writing not so much, but it is there eventually. You know, if I ever get published …

Sheila May 17, 2012 at 4:52 pm

It’s pleasure and torture all at once – hard to beat a high like that…

Reply

Julie May 17, 2012 at 5:04 pm

Aha, it is literary S&M… Sheila, you look all innocent, but there’s a bad girl in there somewhere! (or is that their. They’re?) 😀

Miranda Gargasz May 17, 2012 at 8:28 pm

Love this. So, so true. I think I’m going to print this out and hang it by my computer to remind me why I do the voo doo that I do. Thanks so much for this!

Reply

Julie May 18, 2012 at 6:40 am

You’re welcome, Miranda! I’m blown away that you want to hang up my words. Woohoo! 😀

Jason Sharp May 17, 2012 at 8:43 pm

So well put. There are times when writing is the best that has ever happened in my entire life…Sometimes when it is everything. The feeling of writing a well-turned phrase? There are so many ways to describe it…and no words to describe it, all at the same time. Thanks Julie!

Reply

Julie May 18, 2012 at 6:44 am

I agree, hard to describe. Runs the gamut of “little ol’ me wrote that?” surprise to “damn straight I wrote that!” complete and utter (sometimes deluded) confidence. Thanks for sharing!

Megan@MondayMorningMusings May 17, 2012 at 9:14 pm

Can I get an Amen!

Reply

Julie May 18, 2012 at 6:45 am

Amen! 😀 Now, that would have been a good addition. Being a non-believer, writing is my religion. Well, maybe that’s a whole post all by itself!

Sean P. Farley May 17, 2012 at 9:54 pm

Yay! I was quoted!! Gosh, you know, I actually forgot I wrote that. Even I’M struck by it! I’m a genius, what can I say?? I’m glad it gave you pause, because that way you CAN pour your heart the page – as long as you believe it in. Keep up the great posts. My favorite part?? You called me friend. :)

Reply

Julie May 18, 2012 at 6:48 am

Sweet Sean – you’re a hoot. Now that you are almost done the hard work (you know, math), will we see more quotable nuggets? I’m sure while you’re pushing that writing Boulder Uphill, there are lots more just waiting to shake loose. Friend. 😀

tricia May 18, 2012 at 10:43 pm

Julie- This is great- Writing is my outlet- I never realized it until I started blogging that any of my successes and true pleasures started and ended with writing. Maybe one day, when time avails itself and the kids are grown, I can dedicate some energy toward writing a real book- but, in the meantime, blogging and writing is my “warm puppy”. :)

Reply

Julie May 19, 2012 at 10:11 am

Thanks, Tricia! I think you are in the process of writing a real book, blog post by blog post. One about how to parent happy, creative children. When my kids were younger I focused more on short fiction and silly poetry (inspired by them, of course), because there was never enough hours in a row to spend on something more complex. Now, sadly, I have all the hours I could ever need…

Carolyn May 19, 2012 at 11:25 am

There is so much in your post that can be said about creating visually as well. When I create I very much feel the solitude, release and hope, when I share work there is connection… I love your use of colour to express what writing is to you, the stuff of life, that’s what art is to me, though I can’t wear the stilettos anymore, and I do not like shopping the way you do, I loved relating to your thoughts! Thanks Julie, I love reading you… you’re an inspiration. :)

Reply

Julie May 19, 2012 at 5:45 pm

There are similarities between all forms of creative expression in the way they make the creator feel, what drives them. I really only love shopping when I am with my baby girl. Her enthusiasm infects me. Alone? I get bored, fast… :)

Jen Chatfield May 22, 2012 at 8:44 am

Julie,

I swear I’m not stalking you – well, maybe a little bit. Google just makes it so darn easy. Love this post. I can relate to every single one. I think for sure I’d be in a looney bin somewhere if not for my outlet, my writing.

Reply

Julie May 22, 2012 at 12:45 pm

Jen, stalk away! I love google. Hard to believe I survived until almost thirty without it! Thanks for visiting and commenting, and so glad we connected.

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